Adolf Hitler Campbell

herocious

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ShopRite wants to play its part in snuffing any artifacts of the National Socialist German Workers’ Party, otherwise known as the Nazis.

The bakery department in a Greenwich, New Jersey store denied the parents of Adolf Hitler Campbell a birthday cake with little Adolf’s moniker frosted across in whatever font was considered high style during the Nazi Party rule.  Adolf was turning three.

When accused of being racist, Heath Campbell, little Adolf’s father, cited the several children of mixed race among the birthday party’s twelve attendees and said,

‘If we‘re so racist, then why would I have them come into my home?’

The Campbells’ other two children also have unusual names: JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell turns 2 in a few months and Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell will be 1 in April.

Oskar Matzerath should have attended Adolf Hitler Campbell’s birthday party.  The two youths would both be around the same age, except Oskar Matzerath, the hero of  Gunter Grass’s The Tin Drum,was born in 1920.

I imagine that Oskar would’ve disrupted the Campbell birthday march song with his toy percussion and belted a wild scream to prevent any glasses from being clinked on the rostrum.

January 7, 2009 10:17 pm

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