Has he ever, for a second, known what he is doing?
Sadly, regrettably, no.
Why not pour some bleach onto the foul dish brush?
And why not pour some hydrogen peroxide on the foul dish brush, too?
And this is how he makes his home toxic.
Scentless fumes fill his family’s kitchen.
But he is convinced everything is okay even though he doesn’t know.
He opens a window, turns on the fan hood, walks with his family to a monthly block party, where they wait in line at the only vegan vendor.
While his wife waits with their 2 boys, he stands by the stroller talking and smiling with his infant baby girl.
A man offers him a sample in a plastic baggie.
He says no, thank you.
The man takes offense, “But you don’t even know what it is! How can you say no when you don’t know what it is?”
He says, “What is it?”
The man says, “White chocolate challah bread.”
He says, “Does it have dairy?”
The man says, “Yes.”
He says, “I only eat plants. I’m whole-food, plant-based. But thank you.”
The man says, “Okay.”
The man sees a couple walking by, “Would you like to try some? It’ll make you better looking.”
The man laughs and holds the girl he is with tighter.
That’s funny, he thinks.
He walks with his family to the playground.
His 2 boys play among the other kids.
The DJ plays loud music that probably sounds like bombs to his infant baby girl.
He thinks about his toxic home.
When he looked it up on his phone, it said to call 9-1-1.
He doesn’t want to turn this into an emergency.
The odorless fumes will find their way out the window.
How will he know it’s okay to live again in his home.
Bleach and hydrogen peroxide should not be mixed.
At high enough doses, the two will cause an explosion.
Yes, he could have blown up his family’s home with his family in it in his attempts to clean a very old dish brush, too cheap to buy a new one.
Let’s face it, he thinks. He thinks, The dish brush was irredeemable.
He shakes his head and thinks he feels light-headed.
Is he dying?
He always asks himself this question after he does something irreconcilable.
Of course I’m dying, he thinks.
They run into friends at the playground.
No one mentions the incident, but clearly him and his family are worried about something.
His older son says he’s not going back inside their home until he calls 9-1-1.
His older son says he would rather get bitten by the biggest female mosquito than go into their home.
He doesn’t answer him.
His wife asks if he thinks it’s safe.
“I don’t know,” he says.
They go into their home and try to smell if something is off.
Odorless.
His wife and kids go upstairs.
He is too hungry to delay dinner.
He warms up lentil soup and eats.
“Stay away from the sink,” his wife says.
He feels confident that nothing bad will happen to him or anyone else.
He has no reason for feeling this way.
His family comes downstairs except for the infant baby girl.
She fell asleep and is in the crib.
They all eat.
They feel fine.
Everything is okay.