Like most everyone, I had a period in my life when I played poker, Texas Hold ‘Em.
It wasn’t so much the game that interested me, but the chance to gather around a table with my closest friends and consume liquor.
The drink of choice was screwdrivers, which for us meant orange juice and Ketel One.
We were serious about our Ketel One.
When the Ketel One prematurely ran out, we immediately stopped after a hand, put on our winter coats, beanies, and gloves, and walked to the nearest liquor store post haste.
Ketel One was our oil, our ointment, our aloe, our ambrosia. As such, a walk was little to sacrifice, even in the stiff cold of Chicago’s winter, which happened to be the season when I picked up poker as well as left the game forever.
It wasn’t me who lost interest in the game, or all of us at the same time, but someone else in the group, one person, who got lured elsewhere into playing for money.
Let’s call this person Locust.
I could never understand why Locust suddenly started asking us, as if out of nowhere, “Are you sure none of you wanna play for money? Let’s just play for five dollars. Five dollar buy in, what do you say?”
His enticements were met with the same questions from us:
“Why do you want to play for money all of a sudden?”
“Yeah, are you telling us that we’ve been playing phony poker this whole time?”
“Yeah, are we wasting our time here?”
Then one snowy night the Ketel One ran out in the middle of a hand, and Locust said, “I’m all in,” before we left for the liquor store.
I looked at him and asked, “You’re all in?”
“That’s right, I’m all in.”
It seemed a little hasty to me, his bet, probably because I had a good set of cards in my hand to go with the cards showing on the table, so I called him.
Everyone else folded. It was just me and Locust, who flipped over his cards before the river. Two of clubs, four of spades. In other words, he had nothing in his hand. Even with the five community cards on the table he still had nothing.
“But why’d you go all in?” I asked.
“It doesn’t matter to me anymore, none of this,” answered Locust, getting up from his seat, “it’s just chips we’re playing for here.”
He didn’t harp more than that, but we knew that there was no turning back for Locust at that point. He had lost faith in the intrinsic value of a chip.
To him, a chip was worthless, null. A chip had no value. A chip was void, all because Locust couldn’t take a chip to some teller and get money in return, so Locust couldn’t believe in the chip.
The day Locust said, “I’m all in,” and didn’t care about the result, was the day Locust stopped believing in the world of children.
We still ended up putting on our coats, beanies, and gloves, and walking to the liquor store. And we still poured screwdrivers. Three of us tried to continue the game, but it wasn’t the same, so we stopped and watched Curb Your Enthusiasm.
That was the last time we played poker.
Related TOE posts:
- Job 1.0 Rolling Paper
- 1983 Toyota Dolphin – Part 4
- 1983 Toyota Dolphin – Part 6
- My Pathetic Scrabble Game
- Punk’d
Isn’t Ketel One the whole reason for poker? In my house, it’s cosmos and Guinness. Weird combination, I know, but so are my friends.
Poker isn’t for children, poker should be played for money (or clothes).
This comment was originally posted on Reddit
Why couldn’t you just man up and throw in $5?
This comment was originally posted on Reddit
These people don’t know how to have fun. Do they golf only for $0.00 too? I mean christ… just pony up some money and GAMBOOOL.
This comment was originally posted on Reddit
I remember a simpler time. A time when people used to be able to play games, not for money or for a real concern with who won, but for the fun of it. For the experience. Did we need a prize for winning Candy Land other than to say we won? Was there anything on the line other than bragging rites when we played kickball in elementary school?
The point of the game wasn’t to see who won. The point was for the experience was the socialization. Sure, by the end of the night, someone had won, but that wasn’t the point. The introduction of money changed the point of the game, nay possibly even changing the game. Have you watched professionals play poker? It’s boring.
In a nutshell, the game, like life, was about the journey, not the destination.
Good point. It’s hardly like he was asking to gamble for a bank busting amount
This comment was originally posted on Reddit