1. Sit on the toilet if you have the slightest premonition that not doing so could pose a problem later on.
2. Floss – this jostles the blood in your gums and adds two years to your life.
3. Brush – this prevents cavities, plaque, and the build-up of bacteria excrement.
4. Stand at the foot of your bed – this makes you yearn.
5. When you feel an urge to slip inside the sheets, do so, but no sooner – this makes you feel lucky to be where you are.
6. Open a book that you can get a lot out of in a few pages.
8. Rub your forearms with a gliding fingertip motion – this sedates your epidermis.
9. Rake against the grain of your eyebrows using forefinger and thumb – this sedates your follicles.
10. Turn the page.
11. Resume rubbing your forearms.
12. Return to your eyebrows, which are now unkempt.
13. Turn the page.
14. Take a deep breath with sound through your nose.
16. Read the sentence you are on over again.
17. Close the book.
18. Cut the lights.