Well, says Grandad to himself, won’t you just look at that. This is something new. Believe it or not. I’m 87 years old, and this is something new to me. Just yesterday I was thinking about how dead that grass looked. It has no green left. It’s all dried up and brittle. Poor grass.
Shame they let the field get that way. Shame on Chicago for letting it get to this point. Children play in that field, dogs play in that field, amateur softball players play in that field. Citizens play in that field. And it’s all dried up and brittle. Just look at it. How could they let it get that way? A whole summer passes, a whole summer with its long hours of heat. Three months, and not a drop of rain.
You can’t blame the grass for showing signs of weakness. For letting go of its verdure and turning bland after three months of drought. The grass had no choice. Sun beats grass in the game of rock, paper, scissors.
Boy that hose sure is strong. Just look at it. So, this is how they fight fires? With a hose on a retractable ladder. Imagine the water pressure in that sucker. It must be watering grass a 150 yards out. But what about the grass nearby? Are they just going to forget about that grass? Did Chief say it was acceptable to ignore that grass so long as they watered the grass a 150 yards out?
I think all those firemen in their polyester uniforms should be watering the grass nearby. What are they doing anyways? Just talking? That’s what it looks like to me from up here. A whole bunch of them, too! It’s not lunch yet. Why don’t they each take a hose and get to work? Water that grass nearby. It’s all dried up and brittle, too. Can’t you see that?
I hear they only have to work 8 days every month, these firemen, but for those 8 days they have to sleep at the firehouse, so it’s like working ’round the clock… for 8 days, and not all at once either.
That doesn’t seem too bad if you ask me, says Grandad to himself, get paid a respectable salary with benefits for working 8, 24 hour days every month. The other 22 you can just loiter. Just stand around with your hands on your hips while another batch of firemen take care of the fire station.
But the least they can do is water the grass nearby for Chrissake! If they only work 8 days every month, why not water the grass nearby when they do work? It’s showing signs of weakness, too. How many are there? 1,2,3… at least a dozen of them. There’s even some under the tree across the street, standing on the grass instead of watering it. Incredible!
How man firemen does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ha!
I think I’ve seen just about everything now, says Grandad to himself, I think nothing can surprise me anymore. Yes.
I’ve seen everything under the sun, including this poor grass left parched.
Hey, but the firemen are watering some of the field, and that counts for something. They are working for the greater good of Chicago. Things could be worse. They could be sitting at the firehouse, legs propped up on a table. Smoky the fire dog keeping them company.
Or they could be trying to save lives in burning buildings. Yes. They could be trying to save lives and they could be dying trying to save those lives.
I need to reserve judgement in times like this. I need to be happy for anyone who can spend their time watering grass, even if it’s a 150 yards out, because they could be doing something a whole lot worse.